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Independent edition

Unisex

"These Earrings Need A Turning Radius" Heavy Blend Unisex Crewneck Sweatshirt

Original designs you won't find anywhere else
Free standard shipping on 2+ items to the US, UK, EU and Japan · Usually arrives within 5–12 business daysSingle items ship from $1.99. Any extra shipping for your address is shown at checkout.
Ships with tracking

From$42.95 USD

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  • Big earrings, narrow doorways, and a woman who refuses to choose
  • The engraved drawing magnifies every spike of her trident earring, and the copper detailing makes the joke look like an antique jewelry ad
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PLACEMENTFront + Back print

Model is 6′2″ (189 cm) and wears size M.

Original artwork
Sharp, lasting print
Tracked delivery
Estimated delivery: Oct 22 – Nov 2 5–12 business days from order, including production. The delivery estimate at checkout takes priority. Weekends are excluded; public holidays, customs and remote-area delivery may extend these estimates.

© StyleMZ · Original Design. Reproduction prohibited.

Not fast fashion

Original artwork you won't find on marketplaces. Every design is drawn in-house.
A name-brand garment. Printed on Gildan, not an unbranded copy.
Made close to you. Produced at a print facility near you whenever possible, with tracked delivery.
If it arrives wrong, we fix it. Free reprint or refund for damage or misprints
Secure checkout — payments encrypted and processed by Stripe

At a glance

Who it's for
Statement jewelry lovers who appreciate ironic or humorous fashion
Main benefit
Classic crewneck fleece sweatshirt with a detailed graphic of a woman and oversized trident earrings, plus witty caption
Texture / fit
Classic relaxed unisex fit with ribbed collar, cuffs and waistband.
Size
S / M / L / XL / 2XL / 3XL
Material / key ingredients
50% cotton and 50% polyester Heavy Blend fleece, 8.0 oz/yd² (271 g/m²), made with air-jet spun yarn.
How to use
Machine wash cold, inside out, on a gentle cycle with like colours. Use non-chlorine bleach only when needed; tumble dry low or hang dry.

“These Earrings Need A Turning Radius” — Heavy Blend Unisex Crewneck Sweatshirt

Classic relaxed unisex fit with ribbed collar, cuffs and waistband. 50% cotton and 50% polyester Heavy Blend fleece, 8.0 oz/yd² (271 g/m²), made with air-jet spun yarn.

Design story & product details

Copper against pale lavender and smoky grey sets the tone. A woman in a black leather jacket, hair pinned in a messy bun, pauses at a half-open door while long trident earrings swing below her jaw. Two magnified circles show the clasp and the spikes, and the caption does the math: These Earrings Need A Turning Radius.

On a crewneck sweatshirt, it is an inside joke for anyone whose jewelry is wider than the doorway. Give it to the friend with the most dramatic earrings for her birthday.

Size chart

Heavy Blend Unisex Crewneck Sweatshirt · Gildan 18000 · classic unisex fit, 8 oz 50/50 fleece — garment laid flat, in / cm

Size Chest Length Sleeve
S 20″ 50.8 cm 27″ 68.6 cm 33.5″ 85.1 cm
M 22″ 55.9 cm 28″ 71.1 cm 34.5″ 87.6 cm
L 24″ 61.0 cm 29″ 73.7 cm 35.5″ 90.2 cm
XL 26″ 66.0 cm 30″ 76.2 cm 36.5″ 92.7 cm
2XL 28″ 71.1 cm 31″ 78.7 cm 37.5″ 95.3 cm
3XL 30″ 76.2 cm 32″ 81.3 cm 38.5″ 97.8 cm

Manufacturer specification; allow a tolerance of about 1 in (2.5 cm). Chest is measured pit to pit, length from the highest point of the shoulder.


Product details

Materials & fit

50% cotton and 50% polyester Heavy Blend fleece, 8.0 oz/yd² (271 g/m²), made with air-jet spun yarn.

Classic relaxed unisex fit with ribbed collar, cuffs and waistband.

Print placement

Artwork on the front and the back, as shown in the photos.

Care

  • Machine wash cold, inside out, on a gentle cycle with like colours.
  • Use non-chlorine bleach only when needed; tumble dry low or hang dry.
  • Do not iron the print and do not dry clean.

Delivery & returns

Ships with tracking; the delivery estimate for your country is shown on this page. If it arrives damaged or misprinted, tell us within 7 days and we reprint or refund it. First order and the size is wrong? We remake it in another size at 35% off.

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